I Am a Learned Man

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I Am a Learned Man
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<< Icky and Kat and Balty and Bones (song) I Am a Learned Man Kat and Balty >>

I Am a Learned Man is sung by Ichabod Crane and the townspeople of Sleepy Hollow.

Lyrics

Icky:

Heed me well or feel life's wrath
I am a learned man!
Let not a black cat cross your path
I am a learned man!
To lend an ear or even two
Don't ambulate in just one shoe
Or 'neath a ladder, this is true
For I am a learned man!

Crowd:

He is a learned man, he is a learned man
He can chide you more than others can...

Icky:

For I am a learned man


Ope no umbrella whilst inside

Crowd:

He is a learned man

Icky:

O'er the threshold cart your bride

Crowd:

He is a learned man

Icky:

Eat black-eyed peas on New Years Day;
A hat on bed is not okay;
Take my words for heart, I pray
For I am a learned man

Crowd:

He is a learned man, he is a learned man
He can scold you more than others can...
For he is a learned man

Icky:

And if bad luck should come your way
Then do the very things I say:
Bring me tea and scones to eat
A comfy chair to rest my feet,
Hop up and down and turn around
And spit three times upon the ground.


Bring me bread and roasted lamb
And berry tarts and currant jam,
Pluck your brows and slap your face
And run two minutes whilst in place
Then touch a toad and kiss a tree
And don't forget to bring more tea!


Hold your breath until you quake
Then jump into a freezing lake,
Raise your voice into a scream.
Then kindly bring me peaches drowned in cream (yummy!)
Lastly, rolling in the muck
May drive away your horrid luck
But probably not, much to your sorrow,
I'll need to eat again tomorrow...


My advice do not ignore!

Crowd:

He is a learned man!

Icky:

For if you do, your doom's in store!

Crowd:

He is a learned man!

Icky:

And when you suffer this assault
Of woes o'er which you cannot vault
My knowledge you will then exalt,
And follow my good plan!

Crowd:

For he is a learned man!

Icky:

Is that pie there in that pan?

Crowd:

He can eat much more than others can

Icky:

For I am a learned man!

Crowd:

He is a learned man!