- See Bassett family
He's Wooton's second cousin twice removed. His parents are Milt and Wanda. He has a relative named Mod Collins who owns a radish farm outside Kansas City. He spent a couple summers with her.
He creates chaos with some "force of his personality". He is very clumsy. He has trouble with taking responsibility for his actions. He is a bad businessman.
- He is fascinated with Wooton's comics.
- He went fishing with Wooton when they were 12.
- Wooton called him the comic relief.
- He tried to adjust the spray to mist in Wooton's shower, causing it to leak, because it wasn't an adjustable shower head.
- He accidentally burnt down Wooton's house when he tried to smother an electrical fire with a flammable bathrobe.
- He stole Wooton's artwork and tried to sell it to art collector Hugo Wells.
- Wooton gave him money so he could keep his comic book shop in Alaska(the biggest and only shop in the area) open, with the condition that his mother actually run the shop.
|“|| Hadley Bassett: I found the burglar going through Wooton's desk and cabinets.
Don Polehaus : Going through it how?
Hadley Bassett: Rifling through the draws and compartments in an urgent but orderly manner.
Don Polehaus : Uh-huh. Then what did you do?
Hadley Bassett: I shouted something like, "Hey, stop that!" or "Put that down!" Or I might have just—AHHHH!!!
|“|| Wooton Bassett: You're just in time, Hadley! Breakfast is served!
Hadley Bassett: Waffles?
Wooton Bassett: Mmm...kinda. They started off as waffles, but turned into something that looked more like yellow pancakes. Just smother it in syrup and you'll never know the difference.
Hadley Bassett: Thanks.
|“|| Hadley Bassett: I'm Milt and Wanda's boy; I think I'm a...second cousin twice removed.
Penny Bassett: Removed from what?
Hadley Bassett: Civilization, mostly...
|“|| Wooton Bassett: Do you hear that Perilous Pen? No snooping around!
Hadley Bassett: You realize you've now challenged the Perilous Pen to find out more?
Wooton Bassett: I did? Uh-oh. Is it to late to retract that?
Hadley Bassett: Yes!
Wooton Bassett: Oops.